tianatwitty:Please make this go viral.It is so important I don’t even care if you delete w
tianatwitty: Please make this go viral. It is so important I don’t even care if you delete what I write here, just help it be seen. Screw this (for me, personally. If it works for you, great, which is why I’m reblogging it.). The thing about #8 and beyond is that these things that make me happy? They don’t. It’s a short list. It’s so much shorter than everything terrible. They don’t make me happy anymore. I cannot derive joy from them. It’s this empty, hollow feeling. A giant sinkhole of joy that will swallow everything I once held dear. Because being depressed clinically, I really cannot dig myself out of. Something like this, it’s like having a motivational poster in a room. Or wherever. I may feel refreshed after taking a shower, but that ephemeral fake feeling is quickly washed away. I cannot find joy in anything. The hole gets deeper and deeper every day. Some time my therapy works. Some times my medications work. It just gets so bad sometimes. Actually, it’s just always bad. Sometimes, though, it’s more manageable than others. Clawing my way out of a sinking hole day by day. The feeling of being a burden and ending it all never goes away. I think about it every day. It’s just becoming the norm. I just don’t talk about it publicly, so people think I’m better. People think the medications are working. We know what to say. We know how to smile, and when to laugh. We know what humor is. It’s all built upon layer and layer of plaster and mud and pain and tears and cuts and rope and pills and pain. and pain. and so. much. emptiness. This was supposed to be therapeutic typing. Yet another failure to add to the never ending list. -- source link
#mental health