ms-demeanor:oodlenoodleroodle: justlgbtthings:livingthatadhdlife: parliamentrook:And then it becomes
ms-demeanor:oodlenoodleroodle: justlgbtthings:livingthatadhdlife: parliamentrook:And then it becomes part of the environment, That’s Just Where it Lives, until a bout of cleaning hyperfixation where you have to concentrate really hard on The Thing and the curse is broken. The pillow has been behind the radiator for a solid two months this is exactly what its like and i dont fucking know how to explain this to neurotypicals in a way theyll understand Would it help if someone else picked it up for you? Hm. Maybe yes, maybe no. If someone else picks it up there’s a good chance that the picking up will trigger cleaning hyperfixation, which is probably going to be helpful in the medium term but may disrupt the plans for the day (argh! argh you needed to put the thing in the hamper and now the thing I need is under the other thing and now I need to pick up everything that is on the floor but I have an appointment in two hours one hour half an hour oh okay tidying is done and things look better and i made my appointment but I ran around for an hour and a half going !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!; this is not your fault this is just the way things are and yet !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!).It may be very helpful and may get an “oh! thank you! I meant to get that, thanks for getting it for me!”It may be very helpful and may get a guilt spiral “ohmygod thank you i’m sorry i promise i meant to pick it up i just kept forgetting, sorry, thank you!”It may be frustrating as in “okay you have picked up the thing but then you put it somewhere and I don’t know where it is” or “okay you have picked up the thing and now instead of being on the floor it is IN THE WAY”I think if it’s something that’s bugging you or causing problems many people would react well to “hey, is it okay if I move this thing?” because then it lets your ADHD friend know that they can choose not to have to go into tidy frenzy, that you are moving it so doesn’t just randomly disappear into the ether, or that they can take the opportunity to go “oh, yes, let me take that, i’ve been meaning to clean up in here, thank you!”I don’t know, that’s what me and my spouse do because we both deal with ADHD visual background noise. We also frequently ask each other “have you seen [thing]” in case one of us moved the other’s [thing] or if we place our own stuff on top of [thing] and may have buried it in a pile by hiding it from the line of sight. Large Bastard accidentally erased a pair of my shoes from existence for a week by dropping a tee shirt on top of them, but he knew exactly where they were when I asked because he remembered dropping a tee shirt on my yellow shoes. But honestly, establishing if you share a mutual tolerance for visual clutter and figuring out how you define “mess” or “filthy” is a BIG DEAL for relationships and people should talk about it more. -- source link
#adult adhd