The Chemistry of Drama in CoDependent Relationships The Addiction to the Dance!A therapist did res
The Chemistry of Drama in CoDependent Relationships The Addiction to the Dance! A therapist did research on the Chemistry of Drama and asked all the participants the same question… Q: “Was there ever anyone in your history that really treated you well, was a reliable, stable person and really cared about you?” A: The answer is usually something like, “Well, yes…there was this one person who was really great, seemed to really like me, and treated me really well.” Asked what happened and the answer was always either… “I don’t really know, we just fizzled-out,” or “I guess we just didn’t hit it off,” or “We didn’t seem to click,” or “We just quit calling each other.” In other words, there was NO CHEMISTRY in that relationship! When shadow emotions get triggered, we experience an escalating negative chemistry flowing through our system (adrenalin, cortisol, and other stress hormones) - just think of them as “little red frowns” flowing through our blood stream. When this happens we trigger more emotions validating our belief in unworthiness. And then we move towards making peace or truces that again are temporary. We are seeking the “make up” period cools things down and brings a false sense of temporary resolution that we really want to be permanent. But it is not. So the Dance goes on… In sum, it’s the “Comfort & Relief” or “Making Up” chemistry in this cycle of drama that provides the fuel for addiction. We cannot access the comfort & relief unless we first re-enact those familiar emotional themes of abandonment, shame, and/or contempt. Furthermore, without the entire cycle we will feel NO chemistry; meaning we cannot feel anything in our codependent relationship without the distance & pursuit or other psychological mind game. (Which is why we are not attracted to “normal”, stable people who don’t engage in drama.) How ironic is that? Addiction to drama at our core - and due to it bring served over and over - causes us to gravitate towards the drama. This explains why no drama relationships are boring for the emotionally disturbed. They are healthier but apparently those wounded want another dose, another fix of drama. Another War & Peace Report! http://www.internet-of-the-mind.com/codependent-relationship.html -- source link
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