First 250 Words Smash! #47 Most Wonderful Author: Darcy AddamsMost Evil Critique Master: RebeccaWork
First 250 Words Smash! #47 Most Wonderful Author: Darcy AddamsMost Evil Critique Master: RebeccaWorking Title: Purple Violets The money’s all they need, the guys on the door know them. Arthur had picked the place out a few years ago, solely for the fact they gave you a wrist band instead of ‘one of those horrible tramp stamps’. The muffled base of the music flared out as they entered the building, the noise instantly clamped down on their ears. Bodies milled, sliding past each other, detailed silhouettes in the dim lighting. Coloured lights threw tints over the walls, faces flashed green for a split second, black lace glowed crimson.“Do you think Mike’s got the base amped up more than usual?” Arthur whispered half jokingly as they pushed their way passed a group of girls, cyber dreads laced into their hair. He called it a whisper, but really it was a stage whisper shouted over the music thudding into their bones. Pierre shrugged, personally he liked the way the base reverberated through the floorboards, filling the room. Like a defibrillator, it jolted his heart in to wake-up mode. So, let’s talk about flow and consistency, because sentences don’t always sound the way we think they do. Conflict is also a pretty tricky thing to drop hints of in the first couple paragraphs of your story, but it can be done. Read the rest of this intro and what we have to say about it on the bloggity blog. Submissions are still open, but we’re down to our last few open spots. Once the last few spots are filled, we’ll be closing until we power through our new lineup. (And if you have no idea what this word smash thingy is, read this.) -- source link
#corporalofthedamned#250 words smash