I will have to teach my girl how to make bacon. cumhungrypigwhore:dominauniform:rabblerabblerabb
I will have to teach my girl how to make bacon. cumhungrypigwhore: dominauniform: rabblerabblerabblestuff: I wouldn’t mind someone who did this for me. Not one bit. Talk about a unicorn woman Wow. A “unicorn woman”??? This makes me very, very sad. Bacon and a blow job is weekend, lazy, nothing-to-write-home-about activity at Chez Fuck. And yes. I would blow him while he ate bacon…yawn…eeeeeeeasy. Boys, if you think blow job and bacon is unicorn material, you need to drop that asshole you are taking to dinner every Saturday night. The one you agonize over buying exactly the perfect gift every holiday, and the one from whom you endure mind-numbing talk of the latest gossip on TMZ every night. Bacon and a blow job needs to be your baseline, bare-minimum requirement in a partner. Girls, don’t treat your man like a fucking roommate. He needs to know, absolutely and positively, that whatever he asks of you, bacon and blowjob included, you will drop your “important” business immediately and submit. Submit with a smile, bubbling with lust for this sexual being that gives your otherwise worthless life meaning, protects you and provides for you, and humors you by pretending to care about the shit you prattle on about. Fuck. Give back. Your only job on this earth is to please that man who lusts after you, wants to use your body to deposit his precious seed and release all the frustrations and stress of his day into you and onto you. He works his ass off to give you what you want. God damn. The least you can do is cook him what ever the fuck he wants, and blow him too. Religiously, as if your life depended on it. Because it does. Fucking worthless cum dumps. Embrace your power to please your man and keep him watching the clock, counting the minutes til he gets home to the smell of sizzling bacon and the glorious sensation of his hand on the back of your skull as he churns the slime from deep down your throat, coating his balls and ass in choke-slop, rubbing that sweet spot in the opening of your esophagus, and giving your life meaning. This is not unicorn. This is basic common sense. Jesus Christ, assholes. Wake the fuck up and make his cock and his belly your number one. -- source link