roguesouls:“It turns out that it/she matters to me. Leia. Unfortunately. Sometimes I feel as if I’d
roguesouls:“It turns out that it/she matters to me. Leia. Unfortunately. Sometimes I feel as if I’d rather concern myself with… almost anything. But as it happens I’ve spent the lion’s share of my life, starting at nineteen and continuing forty years on jauntily in the present, being as much myself as Pincress Leia. Answering questions about her, defending her, fed up with being mistaken for her, overshadowed by her, struggling with my resentment for her, making her my own, finding myself, keeping company with her, loving her… wishing she’d finally just go away and leave me to be myself alone, but then wondering who I’d be without her, finding out how proud I am of her, making sure I’m careful to not do anything that might reflect badly on her or that she might disapprove of, feeling honored to be her representative here on earth, her caretaker, doing my best to represent her, trying to understand how she might feel, doing what I can to be worthy of the gig, and then feeling beyond ridiculous and wishing that it would just fade away, leaving me to be who I was all those years ago.” ―The Princess Diarist -- source link