laylainalaska: Okay, so my problems with this on the surface quite sensible-sounding statement are t
laylainalaska: Okay, so my problems with this on the surface quite sensible-sounding statement are these: 1. If fandom has taught me anything, it’s that people are willing to declare someone Unredeemably Problematic and Terrible for the pettiest stuff, and spread the word, and apply peer pressure to stay away from that person, including pillorying them over something they said ten years ago. It’s definitely not just on Tumblr (I remember the same thing happening on LJ) but the social climate here is one that encourages people, especially young people, to make snap judgments about other people and shut them out at the drop of a hat. Or to distrust entire social movements because they are Irredeemably Tainted. For God’s sake, we literally know at this point – we have evidence – that this facet of tumblr subculture has been used by propaganda trolls to try to twist public opinion in a rightward direction by pushing the left to double down on refusal to compromise, unwillingness to trust people, and general intolerance. And this is the exact kind of black-and-white thinking, only one side can be right, “with us or against us” thinking that leads, for example, to blatant antisemitism on the left over the Israel/Gaza situation. 2. People can change their mind about things. And they’re a whole lot more likely to change their mind about things if it comes from someone they already like and trust. Look, obviously you shouldn’t stay friends with someone who’s toxic to you or who doesn’t accept you for who you are. And some people are truly Just Not Worth It. The following applies only in cases where you really do like them as a person and being around them is not harmful for you. But, particularly as an ally if you’re not in the affected group yourself … if you pull away from them, especially in the present climate where everyone is literally living in their own little media world, you’re leaving them isolated in a bubble of conservative groupthink where they’re just going to be pressured to descend deeper and deeper into it. Case in point: my cousin. Given the hardcore right-wing family she comes from, she’s a relatively open-minded person, and we get along pretty well; I like her. Her ex-husband came out as either gay or bisexual (I’m unclear on precisely how he identifies; definitely not straight) after they divorced and is currently dating a trans woman. The family members she’s otherwise closest to (her mom and sister) are both deep in evangelical circles, absolutely HATE her ex and his new partner, and are actively trying to convince her that it’s unsafe for her daughter to be around them. If I pull away from her and refuse to associate with her for political reasons (I’m pretty sure she voted for Trump, for example), ALL the information she has about gay people, trans people, etc. is going to be coming from her frothingly conservative relatives and her church. Isn’t it worth giving her one person to talk to who can give her a different viewpoint on those things? If not for her sake, then for the sake of her 9-year-old daughter? tl;dr by all means don’t keep up a friendship if it’s toxic for you or if you’re not getting what you need out of it, but people are not born knowing All The Right Things To Think. Peer pressure is really goddamn powerful, so is propaganda and media spin, and you know what it does when we withdraw onto our own side of the line and claim that it’s a social value to refuse to associate with The Other, even for purposes of changing their mind? It makes them more powerful and numerous, is what it does. -- source link
#politics