thewolfofwinterfell: I get asked often, especially by younger men, how to find a great submissive. W
thewolfofwinterfell: I get asked often, especially by younger men, how to find a great submissive. What traits to look out for. What are the flags to be aware of. All good questions, and they definitely require thought. But I dissociate that answer from “how to find a great submissive”. That is a different question. The other questions are about “how not to fall for a fake submissive”. Yeah they exist, just like fake Doms. Gentlemen, in my humble opinion, the surest way to find a great submissive is deceptively simple, yet laboriously difficult. It is to be a great dominant. Finding the best submissive for yourself isn’t about chasing women. It isn’t about raking through profiles online sending each one a message and seeing which one sticks. Or going to events and trying to hit on everyone. In fact it’s the very opposite. Be a really, really great dominant. But how do I be a dominant without a submissive, you ask? You see that’s where most people make a mistake. A great dominant stars with himself. Starts with his own nature. Work on yourself. Focus on your skills. Grow your knowledge. Pursue what you love with no intention of showing off or winning accolades, but simply because it is who you are. Groom your manners, your way of speaking. Learn new things, experiment, challenge yourself, fail, laugh at yourself and stand up again. Set a high standard, for yourself first and foremost. Master your own self, first and foremost. That doesn’t mean making a grim face and suppressing your emotions. It means embracing that you are human with feelings, and having the courage to be vulnerable. And you know what happens? The right people who notice your standards will seek you out. Trust me. You don’t have to run behind them. They will come to you. And those who don’t hold a candle to your discipline and self awareness will thin out. Don’t do all this because it’s an elaborate formula to get laid. It isn’t. It’s a formula to be an amazing person. Along that path you’ll find friends, admirers, brothers and companions. And somewhere, someone will come along and say, I wish you were my dominant. And you’ll be in a position to accept it back with love and respect than with desperation, because you know your worth. -- source link