profeminist:canoodlingwithfire:zafirozorro:bilt2tumble:breelandwalker:breelandwalker:legolokiismight
profeminist:canoodlingwithfire:zafirozorro:bilt2tumble:breelandwalker:breelandwalker:legolokiismighty:oh-imprettyboy:a-high-ass-ginger:onemuseleft:shisno:sarcasticnursejess:thelittledrunkapple:How women prepare for first datesBonus: How men prepare for first dates:Accurate.Okay but the first set of gifs is not a joke like that’s literally how it goes.One of the girls at work won’t get in the guy’s car unless he agrees to let her take photos of him and his license plate to text to her mother. If he gets mad or makes a fuss she cancels the date and goes back inside.Reblogging for that I’ve had someone take pics of me and my license plate on a first date before & I was okay with it. I’ve also had a friend allow me to view the tracking on her phone when she went to meet up with a guy the first time. This isn’t a joke at all & women have good reason to worry.i have only ever met 2 people online, and made sure that we met up somewhere that was 1) public 2) close to my home. After, I walked to the dollar store that was a couple shops down until I knew they were gone, before walking home.Louis C.K. kind of nailed it. Men worry that their date won’t measure up to their aesthetic preferences. Women worry that they’re going wind up dead.The disparity is RIDICULOUS, and the fact that dudes get offended when women try to protect themselves is hard proof that way too many guys Do Not Understand how dangerous it is to be a woman. (Not to mention it’s fucking insulting. “How dare you not trust your life and safety to a complete stranger whose intentions you have no way of knowing”?)Lookin’ at the notes on this post following my earlier reblog and just going….Wow. WOW. Look at all these sheltered people and their internalized misogyny.The point isn’t, “NOT ALL MEN ARE OUT TO GET YOU.”The point is, “WE HAVE NO WAY OF KNOWING A NICE GUY FROM A SERIAL KILLER.” It’s not like they fucking wear nametags, okay? Moreover, the most awful people with the worst intentions often put on the nicest face or deliberately make themselves seem harmless and likeable, to lull potential victims into a false sense of security. (Read up on Ted Bundy sometime. It’s horrifying shit. Or read any thread on the “Let’s Not Meet” subreddit.)In order to protect ourselves, we are forced to assume the worst of every man we meet, because statistically speaking, the biggest danger to women…IS MEN. Saying “not all men are out to get you, you’re just being paranoid” is like saying “not every car you ride in is going to crash, so buckling your seatbealt is stupid.” When dealing with an unknown situation, in the absence of absolute proof of safety, exercising a little extra caution can be the difference between life and death. Shaming women for being what you may view as overly cautious is every bit as horrid as blaming them if something goes wrong later on.And refusing to go to a secluded location with a complete stranger without letting someone know where you’re going, who you’re with, and how to find you is just common street sense, whether you’re on a date or just going out for business or social purposes.If your life has been so sheltered (or your coping skills so incredible) that you see no need to distrust strangers or worry about the potential for violence, you should thank your lucky stars.And you should also be aware that just because it hasn’t happened to you or anyone you know does not mean that it doesn’t happen.Lemme say that louder for the people in the back.Just because it hasn’t happened to you or anyone you know does not mean that it doesn’t happen.Re-Reblog for relevant commentary.And if you won’t take a woman’s word for it because you are some kind of asshat, men who sleep with men also mirror these rituals because even men are afraid of other men based on men’s behavior and inability to understand “no” or take rejection well.@profeministFollow up to my previous postwhen i end up alone in a room with a guy i don’t know, especially if he’s between me and the door, i put my hand in my pocket and make a fist with my keys between the fingers, and i kinda start edging around until he’s not between me and the door anymore. I also smile more to ward of the possibility that he’s going to do something wacko because i didn’t smile enough.Keep in mind that I’ve never been physically attacked by a man. I’m not reacting to some past trauma. Half the time I do things like that, i don’t even realize I’m doing it. It’s everyday precautions. Little things women do every day because A) we’ve heard about it going wrong way too many times B) we’ve experienced for ourselves that there are guys who don’t know what no means, guys who demand your time and attention, and it’s a pretty short step from those guys, whom all of us meet all the time, to the guy who takes it one step further and decides that his indignation is a good reason to hurt you.other little things i (and other women) do everyday to protect ourselves from men who want to kill us:check the back seats of our car before getting in to make sure that there’s no one in therewhen walking through an unknown or male-dominated area, or when on public transportation: look slightly forward and down, never raise your eyes any more than you need to, don’t look to the side unless you absolutely have tomentally check your pepper spray/keys/sharp pokey-things-attached-to-keys if you notice a guy who’s been behind you for more than a block or soseriously how many guys carry those key spikey things or pepper sprayif you end up in an elevator alone with a guy, and he gives of even the faintest traces of the “I don’t respect other people’s boundaries” vibe, you get out at the next floortext a friend/roommate/relative where you are and when you expect to be back if you’re out after darkbuddy up to avoid walking alone at nightcross the street to avoid men, even in broad daylightI know it sounds like we’re all walking around paranoid as fuck, but really it’s not an unreasonable fear. Like if how you lived in the middle of the desert, you’d shake your boots out before putting them on in the morning because scorpions, or how you grab an umbrella before you go out if it looks like it’s going to rain. Little everyday precautions. Except of course the consequence for failing is getting raped and murdered. Which happens anyways. -- source link