imparalyzedbyitt:hi taylor!!!!!i am making a grand return to tumblr, so let’s hope all goes well, be
imparalyzedbyitt:hi taylor!!!!!i am making a grand return to tumblr, so let’s hope all goes well, because boy do i have a lot to tell you about. i started my freshman year of college and essentially disappeared off the face of the earth during that whole crazy transition period. in all honesty, i took a lot of time and a lot of steps back because this has been one of the worst, if not THE worst, years of my life. before going to college i was diagnosed with PCOS, which is like whatever, right? i was put on birth control pills to manage the hormonal imbalance and everything was great until i got, like, massively depressed. and right as that hit me, i broke my ankle. i go to a super rural college, and i was essentially immobile for a month, so you can imagine how much that did not help me. but i recognized it and i solved that issue, and everything was fine again! i joined a sorority, i began to pick up the pieces, slowly but surely, of a lot of things that i had done wrong during the time when i was at my worst, and i started to heal in more ways than one. but during spring break, i discovered that i had a blood clot in my leg. woohoo. luckily i caught it sooooo early and got treatment right away, and i’m almost totally better, but i plummeted back to square one as soon as everything spiraled again. it’s been really scary and really tough, and i kind of retreated to twitter in an effort to find myself somewhere else and with other people. like i’m being super casual about this right now in a strange effort/knee jerk reaction i always have to downplay things, but it really has been the toughest year of my life. i have a long way to go, both mentally and physically, but the one thing that has never left me is your music. when rep came out, i swear to god there was not a single day when i didn’t wake up in the morning and walk out of my dorm/to class and listen to delicate. i’ve always said that your music has arrived at the times when i need it most, even if i don’t realize in the moment just how desperately i need it. i first met you when i was 15 years old, and now i’m 19, and it’s only hit me just recently that i’ve changed a lot without really realizing i was changing. you’ve seen me through it all, and it’s only right that i continue to keep you up to speed. reputation has been the soundtrack to everything i’ve gone through, and to see your pure joy and elation on tour has reminded me to try and go find my own. i’m in a much better place, but i’m not totally - wait for it, wait for it, i’m gonna make a pun - out of the woods yet. thank you for being there for me even when i couldn’t always been bright and bubbly and happy and out here on tumblr avidly and loudly supporting your music. i’m glad that i can come back now and see you shine so bright. i’ll be at the dc show night one with my best friend in the entire world, and i cannot wait to dance and sing and scream and cry and find everything i need in that huge stadium that you always manage to make feel so intimate. cheering you on, always. love love love love love you,xoxoxoxoxo paige -- source link