I hope bluebells aren’t too boring. I became even more obsessed this year. I’ll post each trip separ

I hope bluebells aren’t too boring. I became even more obsessed this year. I’ll post each trip separately. This wasn’t exactly an epic public walk but it was an epic mess in a slightly different way. I really held on for this walk and was desperate from the moment of waking up early without much sleep. It was day four and I started to feel the need to go on day two and had eaten a lot of bulky, fibrous foods so I just had to go no matter what. There was lots of legs crossing that morning. It was a pull ups adventure and I wore them under purple briefs and some ridiculously stretchy cotton jeggings. I thought pink against the blue bells could be nice for pictures. I also tried separate walks in white jeggings (literally destroyed on my first wearing), pink leggings and another shorts walk. I feel like I’m getting really behind on posts, and they’re all starting to melt together in my memory so I should try to get them written up. It wasn’t long after arriving here that an uncontrollable cramp hit. It wasn’t witnessed so I tried to ride it out but I lost control of about half the mess before I’d even entered the woodland. It was rather soft and bulged into the pull up with ease. This meant I could at least walk a little more normally with the reduced pressure. It all felt contained and hadn’t stained through yet. But the smell was just nasty. It wasn’t a really hot day like on a few walks recently but it’s a rather hilly woodland so I was still feeling hot and uncomfortable walking uphill in a messy pull up.The pictures weren’t taken until after a slight incident. When the rest of the mess became impatient I was standing down a side path and I had to let go. Everyone knows that feeling when your whole body is just ready to push and I couldn’t hold on any longer. It flowed out a little more noisily this time and even as I thought I was getting to the end and out of breath there was more. It felt like a total blowout, when there’s an extra unexpected amount towards the end of a movement that can leave you feeling slightly shocked. I also tried something experimental on this walk which meant I started it out in an interesting way. But I don’t really want to go into that. The incident happened as a woman surprised me with her dog while I was setting up my camera and the dog became obsessed with me, and I started weeing badly. And I didn’t have anything at hand to tie around my waist and hide my bum. It was a totally awkward experience. She was all of a sudden right next to me, and she would have smelled me and seen me acting defensively trying to get away, holding my bum, all the time trying and failing for the most part to call her dog away that was clearly very interested in my bottom. It was a little too embarrassing. I can only deal with embarrassment if I’ve built myself up to it. This was out of nowhere crashing my mind from pure serenity to panic in an instant. The staining happened as I couldn’t stem the wee as I walked away and I also had to sit down briefly to wait for some other people to pass without seeing me from behind. I clearly wasn’t in the mood for being seen.But the feeling of being pooped badly in a woodland at bluebell time of year soon set my mind back on track. It’s a thrill trying to avoid people when you’re in a mess; trying not to stir any suspicion. I managed to get some pictures and then went back to the car and drove to another location for the pathway photos. You can tell I had to sit down and drive as the stains overflowed the top of the pull up padding on the later photos. It’s just my favourite time of year for walks. And I’m sad it’s over for another year. But I’ve really taken it to a silly level since and some of the public walks I’ve had recently have certainly been noticed. I’ll write up the leggings photo I posted recently in the toilets next. I was totally followed by some irritatingly obsessive teenagers. Thanks for reading x   -- source link

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